As the night burns itself up in the darkness to mark the illumination of a new day, my sleep wanders off in an off limits territory. I don’t know what triggered it into this sudden journey to the netherworld. I do have an inkling, as its not the lack of options that has puzzled me to my wit’s end. At least to my sleep’s end..

Why we fall in love: A pretty psychological reasoning based article which extensively explains the reason why a person falls in love. I must say the thinking behind the article is pretty articulate and horrifyingly accurate. And that makes me wonder. Is that all to the charisma and mystery of the emotion love? A feeling so strong that has been driving people to different paths for so long. The feeling which orchestrates the melodies for a musician, sagas for a writer, masterpiece for an artist, all in the form of aspiration, an unquenchable thirst. Is it just the fact that these people were different elementally and hence the emotion tapped them in a different way?

Who cares about those rarities anyway. What about us? Are we just exposed to this never ending, never altering phenomenon of finding what we deem missing in ourselves in the form of individuals and fall for them? Should it be a ray of hope for the people yet to find their missing piece, that it’s not about the missing magic in them which has deprived them of their counterpart?

Should it be alarming for the young hearts in love that the warm fuzzy feeling deep in their stomach is nothing but the reaction to the perception of the brain that the the other person is the missing piece of the jigsaw puzzle, you. Just perception.

Sounds depressing? Knowledge is supposed to be. It doesn’t amaze me even a single bit that the people who are highly knowledgeable or learned often turn out to be pretty low on emotional quotient. And why won’t it be? Knowledge gives person access to past and present, the answers to what, how and why. Using it to decipher the codes of the situations lying ahead in the future doesn’t seem far fetched at all. Isn’t it the so called “advanced version” of taking decisions while relying on experience? Like blowing the surface of a beverage off before taking the first sip just because of burnt lips in the past.

The only difference between knowledge and experience is that the knowledge, though abundant, doesn’t provide experience. Whereas the experience always provides you knowledge. And here I try to sum up the raging thoughts in my mind. Would you rather trust the knowledge about love, as an dissected emotion, to search for the missing half? Like the 80-90% match technology refers to. Or you trust your prior experience, your instincts, without giving the definitive outline or specified constraints to the person you are searching for. I agree that to conduct a search, parameters are required. But who decides if the parameters we chose, or anybody chose are the correct one for them?

I don’t say I support the ancient approach. But at least it gives you something, an aspiration, maybe.

I am among “the ancients” for now. Accumulated far too much experience and the stupid count just keeps on increasing. I wonder what I’ll do with this much experience and derived knowledge. I even feel inclined to embrace the dis-sectioned version of the emotion. Spares you the emotional trauma you suffer each time your heart splits into shards. But then I think, at least this gives you something to blog about.

Why We Fall in Love: The Paradoxical Psychology of Romance and Why Frustration Is Necessary for Satisfaction


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