WHAT WAS IT AGAIN?

Did I drop it?
Maybe I left it somewhere!
Did I even have it in the first place?
God I wished so hard,
for it to be there..

But it never was,
What was it called again?
I did get some bits and pieces,
Some bloomed early,
some left in vain.

A To-Do List.
Still hangs unchecked.
Meant to remind me what needs to be done,
Still hangs there..
Ghost of all things left unsaid:

Saved mobile balance,
did top-up recharge
to last all night for long conversations.

Ended up using it all..
“Your main balance has been depleted by internet”,
was the mobile phone notification.

Asked friends for loan
against property – mobile
to collect pennies
for imaginary date nights.

Honed creativity,
each skill in subcategory,
gave splendid demonstrations
resulted in friendly favors.

Dropped hints to my mom
that her son has all grown..
something might be cooking,
which would end him getting disowned.

Supposedly held revolver,
loaded with blank,
Turned out, was a toy gun,
sprays water and shoots from opposite end.

I had it all ready,
A perfect runaway wedding plan.
A magistrate, I remained in contact with
Two set of legal IDs for witness,
and a book named
“How to start a new life in Japan?”

I wish I could have done it all alone
I seriously wish sometimes, I do
But there was an absence of culprit, you see
Whose name I could get painted in black,
or dark blue..

Someone whom parents blame,
for my sleepless nights and high mobile bills.
Someone whom friends despise,
Label as gold-digger, friend snatcher or plain buzz-kill.
Someone who refuses to runaway,
Because obviously, we belong to different cast and parental love.
Someone, who acted wide eyed on the creative demo-gifts,
Even though believed that diamonds are always a cut above.

Had it been so,
the life would have been a sparkling, perfect gem.
Did I drop it? Maybe I left it somewhere
Did I even have it in the first place?
What was it again?

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