HACK TO LIFE: Work in Progress

Time never stops. The world around us, it never comes to a halt. At times it may feel like it has, usually when something bad has happened, be it on a personal or universal level. But the flow of time which tends to be frozen, has just been slowed down in perspective to your fast paced lifestyle. It reminds me of the saying true to its essence – “This too shall pass,” which cheekily highlights the undertone of the two extremities this statement stands for, tying together with one fate.

This has always been the bottom line of everything your life stands for, even if you realize it or not. Even if your unconscious consciousness hints you at it, or your subconscious alertness pokes you as soon as you start getting cozier than the allowed threshold. Whatever we are going through, it won’t be the same forever. So, theoretically, either we need to live in the moments. Or, we need to construct our life in reference to our favorite moments, so that the chances of us living in the similar moments or situations increases. As I said, theoretically.

Practically, the first theory is plausible. It’s quite straightforward to be honest, following the principles of “The whole world is your Oyster”, “Life is full of endless possibilities” etc. You live in the moments, for the moments, one moment at a time. Lucky bastards.

The second theory, is the default mechanism instilled in my being. Each life which I have ever been touched by, has been stored in the form of a memory in the intricacies of my brain. I have never been able to figure it out how it works, but these memories have always been an active guidance system. They have been the prime beacon which alerts me when the situation starts feeling familiar. The layup to something good, or not so good. Therefore, I experience the occurrence of Deja vu quite frequently.

Theoretically, this should be a better system. Because the selective nature of this theory should only give birth to close and personal experiences, while keeping away more casual and time consuming ones. Ironically, that in itself is its primary fault.

When you only react to selective people, who give you a certain vibe, you are exposing yourself to a very tiny fraction of people who pass by you. So, as you keep moving ahead in life, the filter becomes narrower. The closeness is something you don’t feel easily as it turns out to be an exclusivity, or rarity. And if you end up getting a hint of it, you latch on to it.

This theory is contradicted by the practical aspect of it. Even if the Deja vu is the guidance system based on the reference memories, what it actually seek are similar possibilities. The possibilities and situations might feel similar, but the most important decisive factor, the human factor, is often forgotten. Even if the presence of a person or a group of people makes you feel familiar, good, warm… ultimately they are not the same people. Though, it is not a bad thing at all. Exposing yourself to different and new people brings in new experiences. And in many instances, that leads to the diversification of the narrow filter. The initial comfort is converted into new experiences, new memories due to same reason. That even though the feeling of Deja vu existed, they are not the same people, resulting in different end results.

The problem lies in the memories too powerful. The memories which start overshadowing the reality. In this system, the memory doesn’t fade away. It doesn’t get corroded. The background noise in it might be removed, to make it more compact, but the essence of it remains intact, so is the person associated. Hence, each time a powerful memory is overwritten, there is no doubt that the new version is stronger than the reference memory. Giving birth to a new reference memory, harder to overwrite.

In simpler words, memories, like the feeling of love, which always will be unique, are the toughest nut to crack. Even if you feel the similar vibes again and they are not strong enough as to what you have already felt, it just won’t work. On the lucky side, friendship doesn’t get much affected, as you could have multiple friends at a time, even if they are not as close to you as the closest friend you got.

Another societal downside to this entire theory, is the communication. Every memory is stored in the brain, like a video stored in your computer hard drive. You just need to click on it to play it. Sometimes, you forget the location where you saved it, but if you ever accidentally stumble over and play it, it will seem like as if it just happened yesterday.

One way or the other, if you have ever touched my life, your clip is present with me. Not all of them would be of same quality. Some clips might be of few seconds and some would be a feature film. But the gist of it is that I don’t forget people. More like, I can’t forget people. Who has left what kind of impression in how much time, is completely out of my hands. You might think I don’t remember you, or have forgotten you because we haven’t talked for ages. I can’t even explain how wrong you are, as you are always a click or a stumble away up in the brain. However, it is just the perceptional problem.

The real pain lies in the fact, that the people whom you owe some of the most powerful memories till date, now cease to exist in your life. When the memories which are a major part of your psyche, turns into hollow references. When each comparison leads to them, only ending up into realization that the shoes are too big to fill. And time, well it keeps ticking.

I wish there was a corrective measure, which could scrap the distance between the theory and practicality of this idea. Otherwise the entire cycle of being stuck in a Deja vu would slowly eat away the happiness, the memories were supposed to be a referential guide to. Because I’ll always prefer living for the moments, rather than living in them. Optimism also has the undertone of the two opposites- boon and curse, tied together with one fate.




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